Archive for the ‘72109’ Category
Due to the special diligence of our Washington bureau, The Extrapolater has taken possession of what appears to be the text of an unscientific poll that has been selectively administered by the Bush administration. Veteran political analysts believe this questionnaire intends to draw out the President’s “true friends” in the wake of scandal and poor approval ratings for the GOP. This copy of the document was snatched from a dumpster behind the office of Arizona senator John McCain, just moments after a low-level aide emptied his wastebasket.
(click on image for larger view)
Congressional reaction was mixed:
Dennis Hastert (R-Illinois) “Hey, I didn’t get a copy of this memo. Hell, nobody will even sit next to me in the cafeteria any more. I swear, you’d think I drove him over to the kid’s house or something.”
George Allen (R-Virginia) “Yeah, Condi’s hot if you like that kind of thing. But I can think of at least three others right off the bat who I’d rather bang. There’s Olympia Snowe, for instance, and Kay Bailey Hutchinson is a stone fox. But for my money, a real overlooked talent is Labor Secretary Elaine Chao. I mean, sure, she’s a chink, but I’d ride her like a pony, you know what I mean? Wait, why are you writing this down?”